Several hours before dawn I was woken by insistent bickering voices – they were doing that thing where they’re kind of whispering but actually being really loud. Arlonni claimed that she went out scouting and claimed that another band of treasure hunters was right on their tail. The group was arguing whether they should attack them now, keep going and attack them later, or hide and then attack them.
Yawning I asked “Would it do any good to suggest a course of action where you don’t attack them?”
Barrelhouse seemed intrigued “Go on lassie.”
I sighed inwardly, if he calls me lassie once more I may have to poison him. “This may be unprecedented in the annuals of adventuredom but how does that grab you? Instead of fighting with these other people what if you, stay with me, allied with them? Attacking a gnoll exclave is no easy task right? Wouldn’t you want all the hands on that task as you can get? Combine forces and get the gold first, and then afterwards you can hack each other to pieces. There’s no use in fighting over what you don’t have yet right?”
Argo rubbed his chin “Hmm, sort of like the story of the dog with two bones?”
“No, nothing like that.”
Barrelhouse slowly nodded “Aye, that be a good notion lass.”
I guess technically that isn’t the same as ‘lassie’. I don’t have any poison on me anyhow. I went back to sleep while they stayed up fingering their weapons and spellbooks waiting for a potential ambush. When I woke up the other party wasn’t too far away. They were even more disreputable looking than this lot. The one that appeared to be the leader was a weedy looking ginger with horrible scars on the neck – the only other person I’ve seen with scars like that had survived being hung. Hanging on him now was a plain looking woman in leather armor with an eyepatch. There must be some rule in the adventurer guild bylaws that states women are allowed only to wear leather armor. Mail isn’t sexy enough I suppose.
Accompanying them were a fellow whose teeth and gums were a nightmare to behold, a huge man who – I kid you not – was wearing modified horse barding for armor, a greybeard who clearly was in his early sixties, and natty dandy wearing red silk of all things. This was quite the organization let me tell you. They we clearly ready to fight, but I was able to talk them down and eventually talk them into the idea of an alliance to go up against the gnolls. Aren’t all these adventuring bands supposed to include a silver-tongued scoundrel? Neither of these groups had anyone in them that could do more than string six words together.
That’s what’s wrong with the world these days, no one pays attention to the details anymore. When you’re putting together a group you need a charismatic leader, a grizzled second in command, a smart guy, and strong guy, and a useless woman. It’s a formula but it works.
The two groups merged and almost immediately flew apart when Molly – the one with the eyepatch – took out the map they had bought at a tavern and it didn’t match the map Arlonni had. Makes sense that the women would be the ones carrying the maps. Things quickly escalated and it was all I could do to stop a fight from breaking out – the entire thing was especially imbecilic since we weren’t even following the map anymore so why did it matter? I was able to talk everyone down and convince them that the best course of action was not to worry about either map and follow the directions of the people that actually live here and actually saw where the gold went. Still everyone was glaring at each other over the campfire that night gently caressing their weapons waiting for an excuse to start killing. I turned to the big guy wearing the makeshift horse armor.
“Do you wear that because you can’t afford to have custom armor made for your size? I would have thought that adventuring pays better than that.”
“No, I used to be a horse – a wizard transformed me into a man.”
The man in red silks chimed in “I’m hunting down the demon that killed my parents.”
“I’m sure you are.”
Gods damned adventurers.
Funds: 9,863 gold
Inventory: Ring of Many Garments, Bag of Tricks (rust), Cap of Disguise, Secure Pocket, Resplendent Diplomat’s Palette, Secure Paypack, Skeleton Key, Brooch of Shielding, Pouch of Magic Stones, Masterful Grey Gloves, Black Marketers’ Bag, Biting Bracelet (Endless Ammunition), Boots of Escape, Bracers of the Glib Entertainer, Ring of Animal Friendship, +1 Falchion, +1 Greatclub, +2 Commanding Light Crossbow, Headband of Alluring Charisma +2, 4 potions of unknown wickedness, Manual of Quickness of Action, Bracer of Fire Resistance (10), Spear of Piercing Thunder
Signet ring, noble’s outfit, candlerod (9), masterwork dagger, succubi carving, Domiel family ring, walking stick, masterwork playing cards, spinel and peridot holy symbol of Kralten, diamonds (14), silver crown, waterskins (6), trail rations (7)
Potion of Invisibility (2), Potion of Spider Climb, Potion of Eagle’s Splendor, Potion of Jump, Potion of Reduce Person
Silver ring, gold bracelet, gold and pearl pendant, gold ring, platinum necklace (2), mithril hair clasps (3), 4 small diamonds
Revenge List: Duke Eaglevane,
Piltis Swine, Rince
Electrum, watchman Gridley, White-Muzzle the worg, Percy Ringle
the butler , Alice Kinsey , “ Patch”, Heroes of the Lost Sword, Claire
Conrad, Erist priest of Strider, Riselda owner of the Sage Mirror,
Eedraxis, Skin-Taker tribe,
Kartak, Królewna & Bonifacja Trading Company, Hurmont Family, Androni
Titus, Greasy dreadlocks woman, Lodestone Security, Kellgale Nickoslander,
Beltian Kruin the Splithog Pauper, The King of Spiders, Auraluna Domiel, mother
Hurk, Mazzmus Parmalee, Helgan
van Tankerstrum, Lightdancer, Bonder Greysmith, Pegwhistle Proudfoot, Lumbfoot
Rumors : Exiled noblewoman (Reoccurring), vigilante “Litheria”(Reoccurring), murderous Halfling (Reoccurring)
Graltontown Buildings – Mill
Behind the curtain – Rolled another encounter today and hit rival adventuring party again. Doing everything with random charts doesn’t always work, but it can be pretty amusing at times.