Out of character interlude – oops too many berries!

Remember Captain Crunch All Berries? I do.

I did not intend another bullshit OOC post so hot on the heels of two other bullshit OOC posts, but Ela is in town which means shopping and I realized I’ve been tinkering with the available magic items for an hour so here we are. Wasn’t that a fun story?

When I’m playing D&D for real either as a DM or a player I always try to make it so we can do the shopping downtime crap away from the table and it never works. We always end up spending half a sessions while people look through books and min max their items. I hate it so much.

The last min-campaign I ran, seems like forever ago, I actually went strictly by the rules – rolling for what was available in each town and that’s all people could buy. Keeping track was moderately annoying but I think everyone actually like it better – it made finding cool loot more cool. Most of the people I play with can’t help by maximize their characters but they don’t care if they can’t for in-game reasons. They may prefer it.

Sometimes when I’m a player the DM tosses out a piece of gear that’s supposed to be specifically for my guy and I feel bad when I don’t like it. “You’re going to love this +2 brilliant energy elf curve blade!” uh, my guy prefers his +1 club, how much can I sell it for?

Anyway here’s the stuff, which I assume is even less interesting than awkward prose.

Singer’s Stole

This black and gold silk stole is narrower than is typical for a shawl and of simpler construction than a cape.  It is lightly finished.

While worn it accompanies the singer with the sounds of appropriate musical instruments, granting a +2 competence bonus on Perform (singing) checks. 

With a DC 16 Perform (singing) check the wearer can turn the power of their voice into a 15 foot cone of crystalline shards.  The shards deal 2d8 points of piercing damage (half damage with a Reflex save DC equal to the perform check) and 1D8 points of sonic damage (negate with a Fortitude save DC equal to the perform check ) to all creatures caught in the area of effect.  And creature that takes sonic damage from this effect must succeed at a DC 15 Fortitude save or be stunned for one round. 

After each successful use in a 24 hour period the DC to activate this effect increases by 4.

Ela’s Fashionable Belt

This belt’s wearer gains a +4 bonus on saves against poisons and a +2 bonus on Escape Artist checks. As well as granting the wearer a +2 enhancement bonus to Strength and Dexterity.

On command, the belt’s wearer can transform the belt into +1 Holy Undead Bane Rapier.   As long as she is holding the weapon, she can also revert it back to belt form with a command.

Ela’s Wonderful Flask

This sterling silver hallmarked rectangular hipflask is made out of heavy gauge silver sheet and is durable enough to be wielded as a gauntlet in a pinch.

The bearer gains a +1 luck bonus on Fortitude and Will saves.  On command the bearer can command the tankard to fill with wine, ale, or other alcohol.  Drinking from the flask can create each of the following effects once per day:

  • Remove fear
  • Heroism
  • Cure Moderate Wounds
  • Lesser Restoration

Out of character interlude – magic item

Two in one week? what a rip-off! I’m the worst. For a refund of your money please send me your bank routing and account number along with your SSN and mother’s maiden name. You may see a small withdrawal from your account, followed by a large withdrawal – this is part of the refund process. Do not be alarmed.

Ela’s Cerulean Sign Tattoo

The Cerulean Sign grants a +3 resistance bonus on all Will saving throws made against effects that originate from aberrations.  Grants a +3 luck bonus to Armor Class and on all saving throws against attacks from aberrations, this bonus doubles against evil aberrations.  The bearer of the Sign is immune to any attempts to possess or exercise mental control over the target.

The bearer of the Sign can banish a Great Old One (no save), but doing so causes the tattoo to utterly consume their life-force, killing them instantly.  There is a 50% chance that a wish, miracle, or true resurrection spell can restore the being that invoked this power to life. Check once for each destroyed creature. If the check fails, the creature cannot be brought back to life by mortal magic.  No other form of resurrection magic has any chance of working. 

Out of character interlude – magic items

I was accused of being “a little down” last night. I denied it but maybe it’s true because I don’t feel like writing anything today. But I am required to by the terms of my probation so here’s some magic items Ela picked up. You know, in case you still play an outdated version of an RPG that’s getting blown away by 5th edition D&D and you’re not satisfied with the 17 zillion magic items that already exist. As a special treat they have no prices or requirements to make them!

Remember the card game Rage? I do. It was great.

Blessed Robes

+5 Armor bonus to AC

When struck by a critical hit or sneak attack, the wearer can spend an immediate action to negate the critical hit or sneak attack (similar to the fortification armor special ability, but without requiring a roll). The damage is instead rolled normally. This ability functions once per day.

Melee weapons wielded by the wearer strike true against evil foes. The weapon is treated as having a +1 enhancement bonus for the purpose of bypassing the DR of evil creatures or striking evil incorporeal creatures (though the spell doesn’t grant an actual enhancement bonus). The weapon also becomes good-aligned, which means it can bypass the DR of certain creatures. (This effect overrides and suppresses any other alignment the weapon might have.)

Vampire Hunter’s Cloak

The wearer gains a +2 resistance bonus on all saving throws against negative energy and level drain, and whenever he makes a Fortitude save to recover from a negative level, he may roll the save twice, taking the better of the two results as the actual result.

Once per day, the wearer can target an undead creature with a halt undead effect (Will DC 14 negates) as a swift action.

The wearer can infuse a single melee weapon she wields with the purifying light of the sun as a swift action for up to ten rounds per day. These rounds do not need to be consecutive. While a weapon is infused with the sun, it deals +1d6 points of damage to any undead creature that is susceptible or vulnerable to sunlight, such as specters, vampires, and wraiths. A weapon infused with sun strike sheds illumination as if it were a sunrod.